The temptation of women
Since 2012-12-06
The greatest temptation facing men is that of women. A male person may be ascetic, worshipping God & secluded from the rest of the world; yet he cannot give up fancying women.
The greatest temptation facing men is that of women. A male person may be ascetic, worshipping God & secluded from the rest of the world; yet he cannot give up fancying women.
The Prophet said (in a hadeeth narrated by Oama bin Zaid): “I left behind no temptation more harmful to men than women” [Agreed upon].
«ما تركت بعدي فتنة، هي أضر، على الرجال، من النساء» متفق عليه
All the circumstances surrounding Joseph pushed him to fall into sin. But, as he grew up, he began to understand life, & he was given knowledge from Allah. He took refuge in God & God endowed him immunity. In Surat Yusuf {He said: “O my Lord! Prison is more to my liking than that to which they invite me. Unless You turn away their plot from me, I will feel inclined towards them and be one (of those who commit sin and deserve blame or those who do deeds) of the ignorants.”} [Yusuf 12:33].
{قَالَ رَبِّ السِّجْنُ أَحَبُّ إِلَيَّ مِمَّا يَدْعُونَنِي إِلَيْهِ ۖ وَإِلَّا تَصْرِفْ عَنِّي كَيْدَهُنَّ أَصْبُ إِلَيْهِنَّ وَأَكُن مِّنَ الْجَاهِلِينَ} يوسف: 33
Transliteration: Qala rabbi alssijnu ahabbu ilayya mimmayadAAoonanee ilayhi wailla tasrif AAannee kaydahunna asbu ilayhinna waakun mina aljahileena
“Succumb to their temptation”, a grown up man turns boyish in his behavior, & young ones are known, when wanting something, not to be patient. Omar Ibn al-Khattab has advised his servant saying: Do not turn your love into torment & your hatred into destruction. Do not go to extremes when falling in love (turning boyish in such love), & do not go to extremes when hating (working to destroy those whom you hate).
Ali bin Abi Talib said: Love your lover scantly for he may turn to be your hated one someday, & hate the one whom you hate scantly for he may become your lover someday.
There is no absolute love or hate, even among the faithful. You must love a person as much as there is awe to God & his prohibitions. Should he part from that path, you are to hate him even if he happens to be your own father, brother or wife. You may carry some love to a person during a stage of his life so long as he obeys God. But once he strays, you begin to hate him. And if he repents & returns to God’s path, you’d love him again. Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal , Yahya ibn Mo’een & Ali ibn al-Madani loved one another in God. When the plight of the creation of the Quran occurred, only Ahmad stood by the truth. The other two responded in a way that would please the Caliph to protect themselves from whipping, imprisonment or death by the sword. Ahmad severed his relation with them. Ali was a colleague of Ahmad, yet Ahmad honored him by including sixty something narrations of hadeeth by Ali in his famous book. When the plight occurred & Ali answered the way he did, Ahmad ceased quoting Ali & asked Abdulla (his son) not to quote anyone who answered as the Caliph pleased. When the ordeal was over, Yahya visited Imam Ahmad & saluted him. Ahmad did not respond. When Yahya started to apologize for his wrong stand, Ahmad did not accept his excuse. Yahya was angry, but when he was later asked about Ahmad he said: No one is like Ahmad.
The conclusion is that there is no absoluteness in love and hate. So Joseph said {Unless You turn away their plot from me, I will feel inclined towards them}, [Yusuf 12:33].
{وَإِلَّا تَصْرِفْ عَنِّي كَيْدَهُنَّ أَصْبُ إِلَيْهِنَّ } يوسف: 33
Transliteration: wailla tasrif AAannee kaydahunna asbu ilayhinna
And {So his Lord answered his invocation and turned away from him their plot. Verily, He is the All-Hearer, the All-Knower.}, [Yusuf 12:34].
{فَاسْتَجَابَ لَهُ رَبُّهُ فَصَرَفَ عَنْهُ كَيْدَهُنَّ ۚ إِنَّهُ هُوَ السَّمِيعُ الْعَلِيمُ} يوسف: 34
Transliteration: Faistajaba lahu rabbuhu fasarafa AAanhu kaydahunna innahu huwa alssameeAAu alAAaleemu
So the Lord backs those who seek refuge at him, he protects them from succumbing to such temptation.
If there is no appropriateness for doing a thing, it looks very ugly. But this does not mean that if there is a reason & someone does it, this does not mean that that someone can be excused. Joseph was praised because in every situation he faced the circumstances were pointing to his fall for temptation. He had good reasons to fall. If he did not, it would be a very ugly matter.
Muslim has narrated in his book a hadeeth told by Abu-Hurayra that the Prophet said; “Three types of persons whom God won’t talk to on the Day of Resurrection, nor would He purify them (and Abu Mu’awiyah said: and would not look at); they are due for heavy punishment: a king who lies, an old man who is adulterous, and a modest breadwinner who is arrogant” [Reported by Muslim].
«ثلاثة لا يكلمهم الله يوم القيامة ولا يزكيهم (قال أبو معاوية: ولا ينظر إليهم) ولهم عذاب أليم: شيخ زان، وملك كذاب، وعائل مستكبر» رواه مسلم
There are three penalties for each of these offenses. Each one of the penalties is harsh in itself. The reason for inflicting all the three penalties on one & the same person is that what he did was not justified by any reason. There is no appropriateness for doing any of these acts. “A king who lies”, why would someone who has all the threads in his hand lie?
The Prophet says “The best of your rulers are the ones whom you love & they love you. They pray for you & you pray for them. The worst of your rulers are the ones whom you hate and they hate you. You insult them and they insult you” [Reported by At-Tirmidhi and authenticated by Al-Albani].
«ألا أخبركم بخيار أمرائكم وشرارهم؛ خيارهم الذين تحبونهم ويحبونكم وتدعون لهم ويدعون لكم، وشرار أمرائكم الذين تبغضونهم ويبغضونكم وتلعنونهم ويلعنونكم» رواه الترمذي وصححه الألباني
“An adulterous old man”, the sheikh usually has already lost his lust & desire. If he was a young man, he might be excused by some for not being able to push back the pressure of temptation. But this old man had no reason to do what he did, so he becomes eligible for inflicting all three penalties. “An arrogant breadwinner”: he is poor but surprisingly arrogant! There is a big difference between a breadwinner who is “arrogant’ & another who has “dignity”. Arrogance is absolutely prohibited by God, whether little or much. It simulates injustice in every respect. On the other hand dignity is a praised quality:
{(Charity is) for Fuqara (the poor), who in Allah's Cause are restricted (from travel), and cannot move about in the land (for trade or work). The one who knows them not, thinks that they are rich because of their modesty. You may know them by their mark, they do not beg of people at all.} [Al-Baqara 2:273].
{لِلْفُقَرَاءِ الَّذِينَ أُحْصِرُوا فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّـهِ لَا يَسْتَطِيعُونَ ضَرْبًا فِي الْأَرْضِ يَحْسَبُهُمُ الْجَاهِلُ أَغْنِيَاءَ مِنَ التَّعَفُّفِ تَعْرِفُهُم بِسِيمَاهُمْ لَا يَسْأَلُونَ النَّاسَ إِلْحَافًا} البقرة: 273
Transliteration: Lilfuqarai allatheena ohsiroo fee sabeeli Allahi la yastateeAAoona darban fee alardi yahsabuhumu aljahilu aghniyaa mina alttaAAaffufi taAArifuhum biseemahum la yasaloona alnnasa ilhafan
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “Those who are in need & yet abstain from asking out of dignity, these are absolved by God. For Allah will bestow patience upon those who exercise endurance” [Reported by Al-Bukhari].
«من يستعف يعفه الله، ومن يتصبر يصبره الله» رواه البخاري
Abu Sa’eed Al-Khidri was hit by a pandemic and poverty took hold of him at the time of the Prophet. His mother or wife told him to go to the Prophet & ask some charity. So Abu Sa'eed went on to ask the Prophet for something that will help him. When he reached the Prophet, Muhammad was speaking the above hadeeth. Abu Sa’eed retreated without asking anything. He said: Later, God has bestowed me with vast wealth & I became the one of the richest among all the Ansar (inhabitants of Medina who received the Prophet after migrating from Mecca & backed him up). He got all that wealth because his dignity has prevented him from asking for help.
And Joseph is the first among the seven categories of people who deserve to stand in the shade of Allah at the Day of Judgment (when no shades are there but His shade). In the words of the Prophet he is “a man invited by a woman with wealth & beauty that cannot be resisted, & he refused to fall saying: I fear Allah” [Agreed upon].
«ورجل دعته امرأة ذات منصب وجمال، فقال: إني أخاف الله» متفق عليه
This affliction of God Almighty was the greatest calamity of his life. It was much graver than the first one (when he was thrown into the pit). In his second test he had the choice of deciding for himself, but when he was thrown in the pit & then picked out & sold he had no will of his own. When Joseph endured all these tests, he became entitled to the honor of this world & the glory of the hereafter. People will continue recalling the purity & faithfulness of Joseph when the lady of the house (wife of the high official) where he lived, tried to induce him to surrender his chastity; she closed the doors and said to him: {Come on, O you}.
{وَقَالَتْ هَيْتَ لَكَ} يوسف: 23
Transliteration: waqalat hayta laka
But he said: {I seek refuge in Allah (or Allah forbid)! Truly, he (your husband) is my master! He made my stay agreeable! (So I will never betray him). } [Yusuf 12:23].
{قَالَ مَعَاذَ اللَّـهِ ۖ إِنَّهُ رَبِّي أَحْسَنَ مَثْوَايَ} يوسف: 23
Transliteration: qala maAAatha Allahi innahu rabbee ahsana mathwaya
I ask Allah to make what I said to you a supply to your eventual destiny, & of benefit on the Day you are witnessed by God. He is enough for us, our supporter & sponsor. Blessing of Allah be upon our Prophet Muhammad & Praise be to God the Lord of the entire universe.
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