Gerda, Ex-Christian, Lithuania
- Categories: Da'wah to Non-Muslims -
I am from a little Eastern European country called Lithuania
where Christianity is the dominant religion, and where a baby in
his first days in the world is made a Christian. I've never been an
atheist, but I never called myself a good Christian. It was the
time when I was going to the church every Sunday, not just for
prayer, but to help the priest and to sing in the church choir that
I had God in my heart the most, even though I would ask my parents
why they baptized me without asking me if I would like to be a
Christian or not.
All my life, as I remember, I couldn't be a good Christian, and I
couldn't understand the meaning of the Christian religion. But I
was looking for meaning. I would read a lot of books about
Christianity, while continuously asking the priest for help. I
could say that I felt and I believed that "Somebody's" watching
over me, but I could not call myself Christian.
Life without God Almighty's guidance was difficult, scary, and
lonely wherever I went. I was looking for God all the time, and yet
I felt that He was so close to me. I was feeling God's help all the
time with me; I felt like He was talking to me. I saw how He was
taking care of me and letting me find the way of life that He had
already chosen for me. I was trying to understand a lot of signs
that he was sending me daily almost like He was speaking to
me.
I am the second child in my family, and my mother's delivery pains
with me were much harder than with her first baby. I was very lucky
to survive the delivery, and I believe God saved my life. After two
really serious accidents later in my life, which people said that
nobody could possibly survive after, I started to really appreciate
my life. I felt how fragile human life is and that only God knows
how long I will live.
God let me trust Him every minute of my life and this helped me to
enjoy my life even when I was sick or feeling bad. I know that God
is giving us everything, wanting us to appreciate Him, so we will
understand that He is doing it just for us.
I had a car accident right after my graduation exams, and I was
told to stay in a bed for no less than six weeks. I could only move
my head and arms, but with God's help I nonetheless finished my
school and enrolled in university while still lying in bed. Even my
doctor couldn't believe that I accomplished that much! Most people
would be screaming with pain or asking for a pill to make them
sleep. It couldn't just be luck - it was a miracle from God for
sure. After this, my faith increased but "SomeOne" still kept me
away from church. I can now understand what was going on - for me,
church wasn't the way to God.
True understanding of God, what I had been wanting for so long and
which would be my only way to real happiness through the calmness
of my soul, I found through my husband. How we met each other was
one of God's miracles too. In the beginning, we never talked about
religion, and we never had disagreements about it. One day, when I
was in a really happy mood because I had just met an old friend, he
(in that time we still weren't married) told me that he wanted to
give me the best thing in his life - faith. God put the correct
words on his lips that day, and I was really interested to hear
what he had to say about the Holy Quran, about miracles written in
it, and about the meanings of every motion of his body while he
prayed. Though it was just one conversation about the topic, it was
enough to make me read as many books as I could get my hands on.
With every book, with every page, I started to understand what I
was missing in my life, that is, what I had been looking for all
those years when I was asking priests for answers. Books would talk
to me - God was talking to me through books. I found answers to a
lot of questions; I found calmness in my soul while those around me
were still searching.
I became Muslim just a few months ago, and it's amazing to feel the
miracle of a rebirth in faith. God loved me so much that He let me
be born again though I was already 21 years old, an age when I was
able to appreciate His amazing gift. Now I am a Muslim. Nobody can
believe how different it is to be Muslim!
God made me see the sun in a different way than I used to see it
when I was a Christian. The sun has a different meaning for me now.
I know that this sunshine that God is sending to us everyday is His
way of showing us how much He cares about us, how much He loves us.
Because of His mercy, we do not feel cold, and we can see the world
in many colors. God created night in order to show us how amazing
His light is. He made us trust Him that after a cold and dark
night, He will bring forth a nice, fresh morning. In this way, God
is showing us signs. He gave us eyes to see His words in every
miracle.
I'm so happy and thankful for God's gift to see this world anew -
to finally appreciate my life. He gave me a new and fresh light in
my life, and now I can see His signs all around me in a different
way. Everything I do, everywhere I go, God is saying welcome to me.
In miracles that He is showing me, I see that I'm on the right way,
that He is with me (in His Knowledge). The world didn't change in
one day, it didn't even change in 21 years. All that has changed is
the quality of my life when true understanding of God came into my
heart.
I wish the whole world would change too. Now people are angry and
tired of looking for calmness through worldly success. They are
tired of hating each other, and of being jealous of one another.
Nations try to survive by fighting each other; countries try to
live in peace but cannot stay without war. Each day, the world is
sinking deeper and deeper down. The only way to stop it is to make
Islam the way of life of humanity. With love and knowledge of God
in everybody's heart, we will find and enjoy the life that we are
now just dreaming about. We will build an optimistic future for our
children; we will not be scared to meet each other and live as a
single humanity.
By Gerda
islamreligion.com