Sara Bokker, Former Actress and Model, USA
- Categories: Da'wah to Non-Muslims -
I am an American woman who was born in the midst of America's
"Heartland". I grew up, just like any other girl, being fixated
with the glamour of life in "the big city". Eventually, I moved to
Florida and on to South Beach of Miami, a hotspot for those seeking
the "glamorous life". Naturally, I did what most average Western
girls do. I focused on my appearance and appeal, basing my
self-worth on how much attention I got from others. I worked out
rigorously and became a personal trainer, acquired an upscale
waterfront residence, became a regular "exhibiting" beach-goer and
was able to attain a "living-in-style" kind of life.
Years went by, only to realize that my scale of self-fulfillment
and happiness slid down the more I progressed in my "feminine
appeal". I was a slave to fashion. I was a hostage to my
looks.
As the gap continued to progressively widen between my
self-fulfillment and lifestyle, I sought refuge in escapes from
alcohol and parties to meditation, activism, and alternative
religions, only to have the little gap widen to what seemed like a
valley. I eventually realized it all was merely a pain killer
rather than an effective remedy.
As a feminist libertarian, and an activist who was pursuing a
better world for all, my path crossed with that of another activist
who was already at the lead of indiscriminately furthering causes
of reform and justice for all. I joined in the ongoing campaigns of
my new mentor which included, at the time, election reform and
civil rights, among others. Now my new activism was fundamentally
different. Instead of "selectively" advocating justice only to
some, I learned that ideals such as justice, freedom, and respect
are meant to be and are essentially universal, and that own good
and common good are not in conflict. For the first time, I knew
what "all people are created equal" really meant. But most
importantly, I learned that it only takes faith to see the world as
one and to see the unity in creation.
One day I came across a book that is negatively stereotyped in the
West--The Holy Quran. Up until that point, all I had associated
with Islam was women covered in "tents", wife beaters, harems, and
a world of terrorism. I was first attracted by the style and
approach of the Quran, and then intrigued by its outlook on
existence, life, creation, and the relationship between Creator and
creation. I found the Quran to be a very insightful address to
heart and soul without the need for an interpreter or pastor.
Eventually I hit a moment of truth: my new-found self-fulfilling
activism was nothing more than merely embracing a faith called
Islam where I could live in peace as a "functional" Muslim.
I bought a beautiful long gown and head cover resembling the Muslim
woman's dress code and I walked down the same streets and
neighborhoods where only days earlier I had walked in my shorts,
bikini, or "elegant" western business attire. Although the people,
the faces, and the shops were all the same, one thing was
remarkably distinct: the peace at being a woman I experienced for
the very first time. I felt as if the chains had been broken and I
was finally free. I was delighted with the new looks of wonder on
people's faces in place of the looks of a hunter watching his prey
I had once sought. Suddenly a weight had been lifted off my
shoulders. I no longer spent all my time consumed with shopping,
makeup, getting my hair done, and working out. Finally, I was
free.
Of all places, I found my Islam at the heart of what some call "the
most scandalous place on earth", which makes it all the more dear
and special.
Soon enough, news started breaking about politicians, Vatican
clergymen, libertarians, and so-called human rights and freedom
activists condemning the Hijab (headscarf) as being oppressive to
women, an obstacle to social integration, and more recently, as an
Egyptian official called it -"a sign of backwardness."
I find it to be a blatant hypocrisy when some people and so-called
human rights groups rush to defend women's rights when some
governments impose a certain dress code on women, yet such "freedom
fighters" look the other way when women are being deprived of their
rights, work, and education just because they choose to exercise
their right to wear the Hijab.
Today I am still a feminist, but a Muslim feminist, who calls on
Muslim women to assume their responsibilities in providing all the
support they can for their husbands to be good Muslims. To raise
their children as upright Muslims so they may be beacons of light
for all humanity once again. To enjoin good -any good - and to
forbid evil -any evil. To speak righteousness and to speak up
against all ills. To fight for our right to wear Hijab and to
please our Creator whichever way we chose. But just as importantly
to carry our experience with Hijab to fellow women who may never
have had the chance to understand what wearing Hijab means to us
and why do we, so dearly, embrace it.
Willingly or unwillingly, women are bombarded with styles of
"dressing-in-little-to-nothing" virtually in every means of
communication everywhere in the world. As an ex Non-Muslim, I
insist on women's right to equally know about Hijab, its virtues,
and the peace and happiness it brings to a woman's life as it did
to mine. Yesterday, the bikini was the symbol of my liberty, when
in actuality it only liberated me from my spirituality and true
value as a respectable human being.
I couldn't be happier to shed my bikini in South Beach and the
"glamorous" Western lifestyle to live in peace with my Creator and
enjoy living among fellow humans as a worthy person.
Today, Hijab is the new symbol of woman's liberation to find who
she is, what her purpose is, and the type of relation she chooses
to have with her Creator.
To women who surrender to the ugly stereotype against the Islamic
modesty of Hijab, I say: You don't know what you are missing.
By Sara Bokker
edited by IslamReligion.com