Wipe the tears you might regret later

Since 2014-09-26

He remembers how all she wanted was a nice word from him, how she wished he could spend one day with her, instead of spending it with his friends. He remembers how she endured his insults, and matched them with smiles and choked tears. Oh, how she lived her life to serve him and their children. Now I know how valuable you were.

Even though she was tired and exhausted, she refused to sleep after fajr prayer like he does, just so she can wake him up for work on time…

She woke him up after going through so much trouble to do so, only for him to wake up angry at her, saying: “Ugh, No relaxation ever comes from you!”, That is her daily “Thank you”.

He comes back from work, exhausted and finds the house clean, food ready, the kids and her waiting, happy faces excited for his return.

However, he comes in a grumpy mood, not uttering even a single joke to his kids. Eats a little and sleeps so he can later join his friends on a night out.

She does not tell him about the children’s problems to not burden him any further. Even so, when she is unable to find solutions, she feels the need to share with him some of the problems, thinking “They are his kids as well, maybe he will help”. But alas, he refuses and tells her that he has too many things on his plate to think about her and the kids.

Eventually, the kids grew up, and each have their own lives, leaving her alone and empty. Her life now revolves around her husband, no one to talk to and no one to spend time with.

She told him one day after she woke him up, “Stay with me today, I would love for us to talk. Every day you come back, eat, take a nap then off you go to spend the rest of the day with your friends”

So he scolds her, and tells her that he needs to spend some time away from her depressed-looking face, “You mean nothing to me”.

She smiled that sad smile of her, and a tear dropped on her cheek, she went to her room while he left to meet his friends.

He comes back home only to find her lifeless body lying on her bed, a single tear left his eye when he put her in her grave, and his sadness kept increasing every time a person offered his condolences.

He goes back home and finds no one waiting for him, the house felt quite and depressing, but he kept telling himself that he will get used to it.

He went to his room to sleep… the sun rose… he wakes up and finds himself late for work.

He calls her to scold her, how could she leave him sleep in!? Then all of a sudden, he remembers. She passed away. He started crying, for she is now a memory.

He remembers how all she wanted was a nice word from him, how she wished he could spend one day with her, instead of spending it with his friends. He remembers how she endured his insults, and matched them with smiles and choked tears. Oh, how she lived her life to serve him and their children. Now I know how valuable you were.

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Will you remain like this dear husband, not knowing how valuable your wife is? Not treating her with the respect that she deserves? Remember, you are where she finds love, pleasure and security, Allah the almighty says:

{هُوَ الَّذِي خَلَقَكُمْ مِنْ نَفْسٍ وَاحِدَةٍ وَجَعَلَ مِنْهَا زَوْجَهَا لِيَسْكُنَ إِلَيْهَا}

{It is He Who created you from a single person, and made his mate of like nature, in order that he might dwell with her (in love)} [Al-A’raf:187].

  • Dear wife,

You, who Allah honoured and made you embraced by the Ummah's men and women. You, who Allah made to be the teacher and carer for whom he blessed the most out of his creation; the human being. Make your work and your troubles for the sake of Allah the almighty, for he alone can reward you. Do not hurt if your children disobey you, do not care if your husband ignores you. Let your priority be the pleasure of Allah the merciful, and work for his sake.

  • Dear husband,

You should know that whoever is kind to them (the wife) is a kind person, and whoever insults them, is a mean person. The prophet peace be upon him said: «The best of you is he who is best to his family (i.e wife), and I am the best among you to my family, whoever is kind to the women, is a kind person, and whoever insults them, is a mean person » (Al-Jami’ Alshaghir: [4102])

Did you see, o husband? “Whoever insults them, is a mean person”, the prophet didn’t use the word stingy or selfish, he used the word mean, which is the worst trait a one can have as it means the person is ignoble and lacks in dignity.

 

I ask Allah to harmonize between our hearts, fix our inner conditions, guide us to the ways of peace, and take us out from darkness to light.

Editorial notes: Written by: Um Sarah, a member of the Islamway Team.
Source: Islamway Team
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