Beloved Brother...Stop Before Backbiting
This is a concise paper about two dangerous afflictions that have been spread among a lot of Muslims. I have gathered it from the words of scholars.
- Categories: Bad Morals -
All praise and thanks be to Allah, the Lord of the ‘Alamîn (mankind, jinn and all that exists), and peace and blessings of Allah be upon the most honorable of all the Prophets and Messengers and upon all his family and companions.
This is a concise paper about two dangerous afflictions that have been spread among a lot of Muslims. I have gathered it from the words of scholars, such as His Eminence Sheikh Abdul Aziz Ibn Baz, Sheikh Ibn Uthaymeen, may Allah have mercy on them, and Sheikh Ibn Jibreen, may Allah protect him and raise their degrees, He is The All-Hearer, the Responsive to invocations.
A Recommendation to Avoid Backbiting and Calumny
His Eminence Sheikh Abdul Aziz Ibn Baz, may Allah protect him, says: “My recommendation for each Muslim is to fear Allah Almighty in all conditions and to keep his tongue silent in all speeches but for the words that have benefits. Permissible words may lead to forbidden or detested ones. This is spread among people. Allah Almighty has said: {Not a word does he (or she) utter but there is a watcher by him ready (to record it).} [Surat Qâf 50:18].
{مَّا يَلْفِظُ مِن قَوْلٍ إِلَّا لَدَيْهِ رَقِيبٌ عَتِيدٌ} ق: 18
Transliteration:Ma yalfithu min qawlin illa ladayhi raqeebun AAateedun
He has also said: {And follow not (O man i.e., say not, or do not or witness not) that of which you have no knowledge. Verily! The hearing, and the sight, and the heart, of each of those one will be questioned (by Allâh)} [Surat Al-Isrâ’ 17:36].
{وَلَا تَقْفُ مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ ۚ إِنَّ السَّمْعَ وَالْبَصَرَ وَالْفُؤَادَ كُلُّ أُولَـٰئِكَ كَانَ عَنْهُ مَسْئُولًا} الإسراء: 36
Transliteration: Wala taqfu ma laysa laka bihi AAilmun inna alssamAAa waalbasara waalfuada kullu olaika kana AAanhu masoolan
The prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said in the agreed upon Hadith and narrated by Abu Huraira, may Allah be pleased with him, “This who believes in Allah and the Last Day should talk what is good or keep quiet. (I.e. abstain from all kinds of evil and dirty talk).”
«من كان يؤمن بالله واليوم الآخر فليقل خيرا أو ليصمت» متفق عليه
These are matters that may be caused by words that need to be warned against as they are among the greatest sins that brings about the anger and painful punishment of Allah. These have spread in communities. These matters include:
1 - Backbiting: which is “Your talking about your brother with something that he hates”, even if he is informed about that. This includes mentioning a defect in him whether in his body, pedigree, nature, action, saying, religion and worldly life or even his cloths, house, and riding animal (which nowadays include all vehicles). It is narrated by Abu Huraira that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said “Do you know what is backbiting? They said: Allah and His Messenger know best. He said: “Your talking about your brother with something that he hates”. It was said to him: What is your opinion about this that if I actually find (that failing) in my brother which I made a mention of? He said: “If it is actually found (in him) what you assert, you in fact backbit him, and if that is not in him it is a slander.” [Reported by Muslim].
«أتدرون ما الغيبة؟ قالوا: الله ورسوله أعلم. قال: ذكرك أخاك بما يكره، قيل: أفرأيت إن كان في أخي ما أقول؟ قال: إن كان فيه ما تقول، فقد اغتبته. وإن لم يكن فيه، فقد بهته» رواه مسلم
Backbiting is forbidden for any reason, whether to quench one’s thirst for revenge, a courtesy for a gathering and helping them in talking, affectation, envy, playing, joking or wasting time by mentioning the defects of another person for laughing. Allah Glorified and Exalted forbids and warns His servants about that in His Almighty’s saying: {O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion; indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allâh. Verily, Allâh is the One Who forgives and accepts repentance, Most Merciful} [Surat Al-Hujurât 49:12]
{يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اجْتَنِبُوا كَثِيرًا مِّنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ ۖ وَلَا تَجَسَّسُوا وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا ۚ أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ ۚ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّـهَ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ تَوَّابٌ رَّحِيمٌ} الحجرات: 12
Transliteration: Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo ijtaniboo katheeran mina alththanni inna baAAda alththanni ithmun wala tajassasoo walayaghtab baAAdukum baAAdan ayuhibbu ahadukum an yakula lahma akheehi maytan fakarihtumoohu waittaqoo Allaha inna Allaha tawwabun raheemun
In the Hadith narrated by Abu Huraira, may Allah be pleased with him, the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said: “All things of a Muslim are inviolable for his brother in faith: his blood, his wealth and his honor” [Reported by Muslim].
«كل المسلم على المسلم حرام، دمه وماله وعرضه» رواه مسلم
The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said in his farewell pilgrimage address “Verily your blood, your property and your honor are as sacred and inviolable as the sacredness of this day of yours, in this month of yours, in this town of yours, and he repeated it several times, then he raised his head and said: Behold! Have I not delivered (the message) to you?” [Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim and the wording is for Muslim].
«فإن دماءكم وأموالكم وأعراضكم عليكم حرام، كحرمة يومكم هذا، في بلدكم هذا، في شهركم هذا. فأعادها مرارا، ثم رفع رأسه فقال: اللهم هل بلغت» رواه البخاري ومسلم واللفظ لمسلم
The authenticated Hadiths reported from the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, about the prohibition, dispraising and warning against backbiting are abundant.
2 - Calumny is among the matters that should be avoided, kept away from and warned against: it is reporting words from a person to another person, from a group to another group or from kinsfolk to other kinsfolk in order to spoil their relation and sow dissensions among them. This is also disclosing what is detested to be uncovered, whether this is detested by this who is reported about or this who receives the information or whether there is a third party who detests the information reported. This information is detested whether it is said, written, shown by symbols or gestures, whether the reported are words or actions, and whether what are transferred or considered a defect or a flaw in this who the words are transferred about or not. Man must be silent about what he knows about the conditions of people, except for what is considered as a benefit for a Muslim or to fend of evil from him.
The motive for calumny is the intention of evil for this who is reported about, showing love for whom is reported about or enjoying the conversation and dealing with curiosity and falsehood; which are all forbidden.
Each one who receives such calumny, with all its forms, must not believe it, as the tale-bearer is disobedient and his witness is rejected. Allah Almighty has said {O you who believe! If a Fâsiq (liar - evil person) comes to you with any news, verify it, lest you should harm people in ignorance, and afterwards you become regretful for what you have done} [Surat Al-Hujurat 49:6].
{يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِن جَاءَكُمْ فَاسِقٌ بِنَبَإٍ فَتَبَيَّنُوا أَن تُصِيبُوا قَوْمًا بِجَهَالَةٍ فَتُصْبِحُوا عَلَىٰ مَا فَعَلْتُمْ نَادِمِينَ} الحجرات: 6
Transliteration: Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo in jaakum fasiqun binabain fatabayyanoo an tuseeboo qawman bijahalatin fatusbihoo AAala ma faAAaltum nadimeena
Man must forbid him from doing that and advise him, distorts his action, as Allah Almighty has said: {O my son! Aqim-is-Salat (perform As-Salat), enjoin (people) for Al-Ma'ruf (Islamic Monotheism and all that is good), and forbid (people) from Al-Munkar (i.e. disbelief in the Oneness of Allah, polytheism of all kinds and all that is evil and bad),} [Surat Luqman 31:17],
{يَا بُنَيَّ أَقِمِ الصَّلَاةَ وَأْمُرْ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَانْهَ عَنِ الْمُنكَرِ} لقمان: 17
Transliteration: Ya bunayya aqimi alssalata wamur bialmaAAroofi wainha AAani almunkari
One must loath him for the sake of Allah (because of his back-biting), and should not think bad of him who is reported about; instead, he is to think well of him, as Allah Almighty has said: {O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion; indeed some suspicions are sins.} [Surat Al-Hujurat 49:12]
{يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اجْتَنِبُوا كَثِيرًا مِّنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ} الحجرات: 12
Transliteration: Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo ijtaniboo katheeran mina alththanni inna baAAda alththanni ithmun
and the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said “Beware of suspicion, as suspicion is the falsest talk” [agreed upon its authenticity].
«إيّاكم والظنّ، فإن الظنّ أكذب الحديث» متفق عليه
He should not spy upon him who is talked about, and he should not be content for himself with what a talebearer has been forbidden to do, so to tell the calumny he heard.
The evidences about the forbiddance of calumny are abundant from the Quran and the Sunnah. Some of which are the words of Allah Almighty {And (O Muhammad) obey you not everyone Hallaf Mahîn (the one who swears much and is a liar or is worthless). (10) A slanderer, going about with calumnies,} [Surat Al-Qalam 68:10-11]
{وَلَا تُطِعْ كُلَّ حَلَّافٍ مَّهِينٍ ﴿١٠﴾ هَمَّازٍ مَّشَّاءٍ بِنَمِيمٍ} القلم: 10-11
Transliteration: Wala tutiAA kullahallafin maheenin (10) Hammazin mashshain binameemin
and His words; the Almighty {Woe to every slanderer and backbiter.} [Surat Al-Humazah 104:1];
{وَيْلٌ لِّكُلِّ هُمَزَةٍ لُّمَزَةٍ} الهمزة: 1
Transliteration:Waylun likulli humazatin lumazatin
Huzaifa narrated that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said: “The tale-bearer will not enter Paradise” [Reported by Muslim].
«لا يدخل الجنة نمام» رواه مسلم
Ibn Mas’ûd narrated that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said: “Should I inform you what al-’adda (the bite) is? It is calumny among people” [Reported by Muslim].
«ألا أنبئكم ما العضة؟ هي النميمة القالة بين الناس» رواه مسلم
Calumny is a reason for torturing in grave. Ibn Abbas, may Allah be pleased with him and his father, narrated that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has passed by two graves and said: “These two persons are being tortured not for a major sin” Then he said “Yes! (they are being tortured for a major sin). One of them never saved himself from being soiled with his urine while the other used to go about with calumnies (to make enmity between friends).” [Reported by Al-Bukhari].
«مر النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم على قبرين، فقال: إنهما ليعذبان، وما يعذبان من كبير. ثم قال: بلى، أما أحدهما فكان يسعى بالنميمة، وأما أحدهما فكان لا يستتر من بوله» رواه البخاري
Backbiting and calumny are forbidden as they spoil relations among people, cause discord and mess, ignite the fire of enmity and hatred, envy and hypocrisy, eliminate all intimacy and kill all the love by separation, quarrel and discord among sincere friends. They also contain lie, treachery, betrayal and deception, heap random accusations to innocent people, and give free reins for cursing, swearing and mentioning of ugliness. They are also symbols of cowardice, meanness and weakness. In addition, the person involved in calumny bears great sins that necessitate the anger, wrath and painful punishment of Allah.
His Eminence Sheikh Ibn Uthaymeen, may Allah have mercy on him, said: “O Muslims, there are two great afflictions that have spread among many Muslims. Being safe from them, however, is easy for those whom Allah Almighty has made it easy for them. O Muslims the affliction of backbiting and the affliction of calumny have spread among us.
As for backbiting, this is mentioning the absent person with what he hates from an action or a characteristic that he has. Many people are concerned in meetings in eating the flesh of so-and-so. A person says so-and-so is characterized by such and such. However, if you examine him, you will find him the most defected one with the worst moral and the weakest honesty. Such a person is ominous for himself and for his companions, as if his companions do not blame him, they will be then partners in the guilt, even if they do not say anything.
O Muslims, Allah has described this man who backbites his Muslim brothers with the ugliest form, as this who eats the flesh of his dead brother. How ugly this who sits and eats the corpse of his brother, cutting and eating from the flesh.
O Muslims, if you hear this who backbites his Muslim brothers, you must prevent him and defend the honor of your brothers. Do not you, if you see a person standing in a funeral of a Muslim man and eat his flesh, resist and blame him? Backbiting is exactly like that; as Allah Almighty has said {Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting).} [Surat Al-Hujurat 49:12].
{أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ} الحجرات: 12
Transliteration: ayuhibbu ahadukum an yakula lahma akheehi maytan fakarihtumoohu
It is not hard to conceive that on the Day of Judgment the one who backbites his brothers is punished by bringing them near in the form of dead people and he is to be forced to eat from them, as it was narrated in the Hadith of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him. In the Night of the Ascent, The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has passed through people with copper nails who scratch their faces and chests. He said: “Who are those Gabriel? He said: those are the ones who eat the flesh of people (backbite them) and slander their honor” [Authenticated by Al-Albani].
«لما عرج بي مررت بقوم لهم أظفار من نحاس، يخمشون وجوههم وصدورهم، فقلت: من هؤلاء يا جبريل؟ قال: هؤلاء الذين يأكلون لحوم الناس، ويقعون في أعراضهم» صحيح الألباني
O Muslims, when being advised, many backbiters say: we do not tell lies about him, he really does that. The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, was asked: What if my brother has what I say [about him], he said “If he has what you said then you have backbitten him, and if he does not have what you say then you have falsified lies about him” [Reported by Muslim].
«قيل: أفرأيت إن كان في أخي ما أقول؟ قال: إن كان فيه ما تقول، فقد اغتبته. وإن لم يكن فيه، فقد بهته» رواه مسلم
He made it clear to his nation that backbiting is to criticize your brother with what he has. If you criticize him with something that he does not have, you then combine two evils: falsehood and backbiting. Imam Ahmed Ibn Hanbal and the scholars of his doctrine mentioned that backbiting is a great sin, so be aware, O Muslim, from that. Occupy yourself with your faults instead of the faults of others. Search inside yourself whether you are free from faults. You may blame people while you have more faults than them. If you are true in what you say, sincere in your advice and you see a fault in your brother, you should then contact and advise him. This is the requirement of the believing Islamic brotherhood and the Islamic way.
The second affliction that has spread among some people is the affliction of calumny; that is reporting words among people. Someone goes to another saying that so-and-so says such-and-such for spoiling and casting animosity and hatred among Muslims. This is calumny which is a great sin and reason for torture both in the grave and in Hell. The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said: “The tale-bearer will not enter Paradise” [Reported by Muslim].
«لا يدخل الجنة نمّام» رواه مسلم
He has also passed by two graves and said: “These two persons are being tortured not for a major sin (i.e. in something not difficult for them to give up)! One of them never saved himself from being soiled with his urine while the other used to go about with calumnies” [Agreed upon].
«مر رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم على قبرين . فقال: أما إنهما ليعذبان، وما يعذبان في كبير. أما أحدهما فكان يمشي بالنميمة، وأما الآخر فكان لا يستتر من بوله» متفق عليه
O Muslims, if a person is told by someone that so-and-so says such-and-such about him, he has to blame him and prevent him from saying that and to be wary of him. This who reports the words of people about you, will verily report about you what you have not said. Allah Almighty has said: {And (O Muhammad) obey you not everyone Hallaf Mahîn (the one who swears much and is a liar or is worthless). (10) A slanderer, going about with calumnies,} [Surat Al-Qalam 68:10-11]
{وَلَا تُطِعْ كُلَّ حَلَّافٍ مَّهِينٍ ﴿١٠﴾ هَمَّازٍ مَّشَّاءٍ بِنَمِيمٍ} القلم: 10-11
Transliteration: Wala tutiAA kullahallafin maheenin (10) Hammazin mashshain binameemin
Brother... Stop Before Backbiting
My beloved brother, take a stance with yourself before backbiting your brothers
The first stance: is backbiting a good deed by which you approach to Allah Almighty; to increase your good deeds, and accordingly, get you closer to Paradise, or is it on contrary to that?
The second stance: do you like that you are backbitten by anyone, who mentions your defaults and faults, and how many defaults and disadvantages there are. If you do not like that, your brothers do not like that as well.
The third stance: before backbiting your brothers, remember this verse {Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting).} [Surat Al-Hujurat 49:12].
{أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ} الحجرات: 12
Transliteration: ayuhibbu ahadukum an yakula lahma akheehi maytan fakarihtumoohu
The fourth stance: before backbiting, remember that backbiting is the commodity of the cowardly people. A backbiter does not speak but in absence. If he is brave, he will speak and reveal what he hides in himself in the presence of the backbitten. He is, however, coward and of weak self.
Do you like to be described by such ugly characteristic that defaults your humanity?
The fifth stance: before backbiting, remember that backbiting is an increase and decrease; an increase to your sins and misdeeds and a decrease to your reward and good deeds. Good deeds and misdeeds are your goods on the Day of Resurrection. You have to choose in this world whether to increase your good deeds or your misdeeds. The only winner or loser is you. So, choose for yourself.
The sixth stance: before backbiting, remember and put before your eyes the following Hadiths. It is worthy that you memorize them
The saying of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, “anybody who believes in Allah and the Last Day should talk what is good or keep quiet” [Agreed upon].
«من كان يؤمن بالله واليوم الآخر فليقل خيرا أو ليصمت» متفق عليه
The saying of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, “Verily, a slave of Allah may utter a word without thinking whether it is right or wrong, he may slip down in the Fire as far away a distance equal to that between the East.” [Reported by Al-Bukhari], and in the narration of Muslim “and the West”.
«إن العبد ليتكلم بالكلمة ما يتبيّن فيها، يزلُّ بها في النار أبعد مما بين المشرق» رواه البخاري، وفي رواية مسلم «والمغرب»
The saying of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, “All things of a Muslim are inviolable for his brother in faith: his blood, his wealth and his honor” [Reported by Muslim].
«كل المسلم على المسلم حرام: دمه وعرضه وماله» رواه مسلم
The saying of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, “When I was ascended I passed through people with copper nails who scratch their faces and chests. I said: “Who are those Gabriel? He said: those are the ones who eat the flesh of people (backbite them) and slander their honor” [Reported by Abu Dawud and authenticated by Al-Albani].
«لمّا عُرِجَ بي مررت بقوم لهم أظفار من نحاس يخمشون وجوههم وصدورهم، فقلت: من هؤلاء يا جبريل؟ قال: هؤلاء الذين يأكلون لحوم الناس ويقعون في أعراضهم» رواه أبو داود وصححه الألباني
His saying while passing through one of the grave-yards of Medina or Mecca when he heard the voices of two persons who were being tortured in their graves. The Prophet said, “These two persons are being tortured not for a major sin (to avoid).” The Prophet then added, “Yes! (they are being tortured for a major sin). Indeed, one of them never saved himself from being soiled with his urine while the other used to go about with calumnies (to make enmiy between friends). The Prophet then asked for a green leaf of a date-palm tree, broke it into two pieces and put one on each grave. On being asked why he had done so, he replied, “I hope that their torture might be lessened, till these get dried.” [Reported by Al-Bukhari].
«خرج النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم من بعض حيطان المدينة، فسمع صوت إنسانين يعذبان في قبورهما، فقال: يعذبان، وما يعذبان في كبير، وإنه لكبير، كان أحدهما لا يستتر من البول ، وكان الآخر يمشي بالنميمة. ثم دعا بجريدة فكسرها بكسرتين أو ثنتين، فجعل كسرة في قبر هذا، وكسرة في قبر هذا، فقال: لعله يخفف عنهما ما لم ييبسا» رواه البخاري
The seventh stance: primarily remember, whom you disobey by backbiting. Do you disobey so-and-so? Do you breach the order of so-and-so? No, you disobey Allah Almighty. You breach the order of your Creator, your Sustainer, and your Perceiver; the One Who has bounty over you, the Almighty. By backbiting, you fight Allah Glorified and Exalted. Do you like to be one of those who fight Allah Glorified and Exalted?
My Beloved Brother... Stop Before Calumny
The first stance: before calumny, remember the Hadiths mentioned by the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, about calumny. They include:
They saying of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, “A Qattat (tale-bearer) will not enter Paradise” [Agreed upon],
«لا يدخل الجنة قتات» متفق عليه
And in another narration ““The tale-bearer will not enter Paradise” [Reported by Muslim].
«لا يدخل الجنة نمام» رواه مسلم
And his saying when he passed by two graves the persons in which were tortured: “These two persons are being tortured not for a major sin, Yes! (they are being tortured for a major sin). One of them never saved himself from being soiled with his urine while the other used to go about with calumnies (to make enmity between friends)”. The Prophet then asked for a green leaf of a date-palm tree, broke it into two pieces and put one on each grave. On being asked why he had done so, he replied, “I hope that their torture might be lessened, till these get dried.” [Agreed upon].
«مر النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم على قبرين، فقال: إنهما ليعذبان، وما يعذبان من كبير. ثم قال: بلى، أما أحدهما فكان يسعى بالنميمة، وأما أحدهما فكان لا يستتر من بوله. قال: ثم أخذ عودا رطبا، فكسره باثنتين، ثم غرز كل واحد منهما على قبره، ثم قال: لعله يخفف عنهما ما لم يبسا» رواه البخاري
The second stance: before calumny, remember that it is the goods of the wicked people. Talebearers are the most wicked of this nation. Asmaa Bint Yazeed narrated that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said: “Should I inform you about the best of you”, they said: yes. He said “Those whom upon being seen Allah is mentioned. Should I inform you about the worst of you”, they said: yes. He said “Those who are talebearers who spoil the relation among the lovers…” to the end of the Hadith [Reported as good by Al-Albani].
«ألا أخبركم بخياركم؟ قالوا: بلى، قال: الذين إذا رؤوا ذكر الله، أفلا أخبركم بشراركم؟ قالوا : بلى، قال: المشاؤون بالنميمة، المفسدون بين الأحبة...» حسنه الألباني
The third stance: before calumny, remember that it is from the integrity of faith that a Muslim must love for his brother what he loves for himself. Anas narrated that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said “None of you will be a [perfect] believer until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself” [Agreed upon].
«لا يؤمن أحدكم حتى يحب لأخيه ما يحب لنفسه» متفق عليه
Do you like anyone to spread calumnies about you so he sows dissention between you and the people you love? If you do not like that, do not make calumny as goods for you by which you sow divisions among lovers. Love for your brothers what you love for yourself.
The forth stance: before calumny, remember that those among whom you are trying to spoil will be your antagonist on the Day of Resurrection, this great day where there is no reckoning but according to good deeds and misdeeds.
The fifth stance: before calumny, remember that one day you will be unmasked before people. Then, you will be alone and outcast, with no companion or a beloved.
The sixth stance: before calumny, remember death and its stupors, the short worldly life, the nearness of death, the quick traveling to the Last Home, the embrace of the grave and its torture, the Day of Resurrection and its terrors, and the Hellfire and its shackles.
The seventh stance: primarily remember that by calumny you disobey Allah Almighty and declare war against the Decree of Allah Almighty. So be aware not to do such matter and do not throw yourself into destruction.
Causes and Motives of Backbiting and Calumny:
1- Weakness of faith: by not caring about the punishment of Allah and about disobeying Him, Glorified and Exalted.
2- The bad breeding of children.
3- Bad companion: “A man follows the creed of his close friends, so you should consider whom to befriend” [Reported as good by Al-Albani].
«الرجل على دين خليله، فلينظر أحدكم من يخالل» حسنه الألباني
4- Arrogance, pride, self-conceit, and seeing oneself as being better than others.
5- Grudge and envy that drive man to backbite others.
6- Entertainment and leisure time wasting.
7- Satisfying friends.
8- Ignorance, it is either ignorance of the ruling of backbiting and calumny or their bad consequence and painful punishment of Allah Almighty.
Methods of Treatment of Backbiting and Calumny:
1. Good education and exerting the righteous example.
2. Good company that helps in good deeds and warns against evil.
3. Occupying the leisure time; leisure is a two-edged weapon. This who occupies it in good deeds is the winner in both this worldly life and the Hereafter.
4. Preferring the pleasure of Allah to the pleasure of others.
5. The contentment and satisfaction of the gifts of Allah Almighty and praising Him in all conditions.
6. Strengthening belief by useful knowledge and the increase of righteous deeds.
7. Being busy by one’s defects rather than by the defects of others, by searching for, treating and trying to get rid of them.
Fatwas about Backbiting and Calumny:
Question: One of my friends often speaks about the honors of people. I have advised him but in vain. It seems that it has become a habit for him. Sometimes he speaks about people with good intention. Is it permissible to part-company with him?
Answer: Speaking about the honors of Muslims with what they hate is an abominable action and a forbidden backbiting. It is a great sin as Allah Almighty has said {Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting).} [Surat Al-Hujurat 12:12].
{أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ} الحجرات: 12
Transliteration: ayuhibbu ahadukum an yakula lahma akheehi maytan fakarihtumoohu
In addition, Muslim reported in his Authentic Book the Hadith narrated by Abu Huraira, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said: “Do you know what is backbiting? They said: Allah and His Messenger know best. He said: “Your talking about your brother with something that he hates”. It was said to him: What is your opinion about this that if I actually find (that failing) in my brother which I made a mention of? He said: “If it is actually found (in him) what you assert, you in fact backbit him, and if that is not in him it is a slander.”
«أتدرون ما الغيبة؟ قالوا: الله ورسوله أعلم. قال: ذكرك أخاك بما يكره، قيل: أفرأيت إن كان في أخي ما أقول؟ قال: إن كان فيه ما تقول، فقد اغتبته. وإن لم يكن فيه، فقد بهته» رواه مسلم
It is authenticated about the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, that he said: In the night of ascent, he passed through people with copper nails who scratch their faces and chests. He said: “Who are those Gabriel? He said: those are the ones who eat the flesh of people (backbite them) and slander their honor”. It is reported by Abu Dawud and authenticated by al-Albani. The Scholar Ibn Muflih authenticated it.
«لما عرج بي مررت بقوم لهم أظفار من نحاس، يخمشون وجوههم وصدورهم، فقلت: من هؤلاء يا جبريل؟ قال: هؤلاء الذين يأكلون لحوم الناس، ويقعون في أعراضهم» رواه أبو داود وصححه الألباني، قال أبن مفلح: صحيح
You, as well as other Muslims, should not sit with the one who backbites Muslims. You have to advise and blame him, as the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, has said: “The one of you who sees an atrocity has to change it by his hand, if he cannot then by his tongue and if he cannot then by his heart, and this is the weakest belief” [Reported by Muslim in his authentic book of Hadith].
«من رأى منكم منكرا فليغيره بيده. فإن لم يستطع فبلسانه. فإن لم يستطع فبقلبه. وذلك أضعف الإيمان» رواه مسلم
If he does not obey, do not sit with him, as this is the perfection of blaming him.
May Allah reform the Muslims’ conditions and guide them to their happiness and salvation in both this worldly life and the Hereafter. (His Eminence Sheikh Abdul Aziz ibn Baz)
Question: Your Eminence Sheikh, the best entertainment for a group of people is backbiting, calumny, playing cards and others. The question is: is it permissible to sit with them, keeping in mind that they are my people with whom I have brotherly, affinity, friendly and other relationships.
Answer: These people whose best entertainment is to eat the flesh of their dead brothers are in fact foolish as Allah Almighty says in His Holy Book {Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting).} [Surat Al-Hujurat 49:12].
{أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ} الحجرات: 12
Transliteration: ayuhibbu ahadukum an yakula lahma akheehi maytan fakarihtumoohu
So, these people who eat the flesh of people -we seek refuge with Allah- in their meetings have committed a great sin. It is your duty to advise them. If they accept and quit doing that, it is fine then; otherwise, you should leave and not sit with them, as Allah Almighty has said {And it has already been revealed to you in the Book (this Qur’ân) that when you hear the Verses of Allâh being denied and mocked at, then sit not with them, until they engage in a talk other than that; (but if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be like them. Surely, Allâh will collect the hypocrites and disbelievers all together in Hell. [Surat An-Nisâ’ 4:140].
{وَقَدْ نَزَّلَ عَلَيْكُمْ فِي الْكِتَابِ أَنْ إِذَا سَمِعْتُمْ آيَاتِ اللَّـهِ يُكْفَرُ بِهَا وَيُسْتَهْزَأُ بِهَا فَلَا تَقْعُدُوا مَعَهُمْ حَتَّىٰ يَخُوضُوا فِي حَدِيثٍ غَيْرِهِ ۚ إِنَّكُمْ إِذًا مِّثْلُهُمْ ۗ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ جَامِعُ الْمُنَافِقِينَ وَالْكَافِرِينَ فِي جَهَنَّمَ جَمِيعًا} النساء: 140
Transliteration: Waqad nazzala AAalaykum fee alkitabi an itha samiAAtum ayati Allahi yukfaru biha wayustahzao biha fala taqAAudoo maAAahum hatta yakhoodoo feehadeethin ghayrihi innakum ithan mithluhum inna Allaha jamiAAu almunafiqeena waalkafireena fee jahannama jameeAAan
As He has made the ruling of those who hear the verses of Allah being denied and ridiculed as the ruling of those who do that, though this is a great sin that takes you out of the pale of Islam; then this who takes part with the disobedient in less matters, is just like those who took part with the disobedient who denied and ridiculed the verses of Allah. Hence, this who sits in a place where backbiting is taking place has the same sin as the backbiter himself. You have, then, to leave their meetings and not to sit with them. Having a strong relationship with them will not benefit you neither on the Day of Resurrection nor while you are alone in your grave. Soon you will leave them or they will leave you and then each one will be alone with his own deeds and actions. Allah Almighty has said in the Holy Quran {Friends on that Day will be foes one to another except Al-Muttaqûn (the pious)} [Surat Az-Zukhruf 43:67].
{الْأَخِلَّاءُ يَوْمَئِذٍ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلَّا الْمُتَّقِينَ} الزخرف: 67
Transliteration: Alakhillao yawmaithin baAAduhum libaAAdin AAaduwwun illa almuttaqeena
(His Eminence Sheikh ibn Uthaymeen)
Question: Your Eminence Sheikh, what is your advice, may Allah Almighty protect you, for backbiters, talebearers and those who amuse themselves with the honors of Muslims?
Answer: there is no doubt that backbiting is a great sin as it contains mocking Muslims and ridiculing them. It includes belittling Muslims by mentioning their defects, revealing their secrets and searching for their disadvantages while hiding their advantages. Therefore, there is a stern prohibition against backbiting as Allah Almighty has said {Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting).} [Surat Al-Hujurat: 12].
{أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ} الحجرات: 12
Transliteration: ayuhibbu ahadukum an yakula lahma akheehi maytan fakarihtumoohu
This is degrading doing such an action and reproaching for the doer by making him similar to the one who eats the flesh of the dead.
It is proven that Aisha – or another Mother of the Believers – said “O Messenger of Allah, it is enough that Safiya is such-and-such”, she means that she is short. He said: “You said a word which if mixed by the sea water, it will change it” [Authenticated by Al-Albani].
«قلت للنبي صلى الله عليه وسلم حسبك من صفية كذا وكذا قال غير مسدد تعني قصيرة فقال لقد قلت كلمة لو مزجت بماء البحر لمزجته» صححه الألباني
The Prophet explained backbiting as “Your mentioning of your brother with what he hates”. It is said: O Messenger of Allah what if my brother has what I say [about him], he said “If he has what you said then you have backbitten him, and if he does not have what you say then you have fabricated lies about him” [Reported by Muslim].
«أتدرون ما الغيبة؟ قالوا: الله ورسوله أعلم. قال: ذكرك أخاك بما يكره، قيل: أفرأيت إن كان في أخي ما أقول؟ قال: إن كان فيه ما تقول، فقد اغتبته. وإن لم يكن فيه، فقد بهته» رواه مسلم
As for calumny, it is reporting words of people in order to sow dissension and spoil. In the Hadith “A Qattat will not enter Paradise”, i.e. a talebearer [Reported by Muslim].
«لا يدخل الجنة قتات» رواه مسلم
It is narrated also in the Hadith “Should I inform you what the bite is? It is calumny among people” [Reported by Muslim].
«ألا أنبئكم ما العضة؟ هي النميمة القالة بين الناس» رواه مسلم
Therefore, some scholars said: “A talebearer spoils in one hour what a magician cannot do in a year.” Allah, therefore, dispraises this that does that by saying {A slanderer, going about with calumnies} [Surat Al-Qalam 68:11]
{هَمَّازٍ مَّشَّاءٍ بِنَمِيمٍ} القلم: 10-11
Transliteration: Hammazin mashshain binameemin
and His Almighty saying: {Woe to every slanderer and backbiter} i.e. the talebearer [Surat Al-Humazah 104:1];
{وَيْلٌ لِّكُلِّ هُمَزَةٍ لُّمَزَةٍ} الهمزة: 1
Transliteration:Waylun likulli humazatin lumazatin
As there is a threatening that he does not enter Paradise, this shows then that this is a great sin. We recommend Muslims to shun backbiting and calumny and avoid making honors the amusement of assemblies. A Muslim should defend the honor of his brother in his absence in order for Allah to help and reward him for his defending for Muslims. Allah knows best. (His Eminence Sheikh ibn Jibreen)
Finally, my dear brother... You can refer to the book: (Beware of the Reprehensible Goods, Backbiting and Calumny)
Ibn Khuzaymah House
With little modification